We Need To Talk About Grief…
Big G and Little g
My aunt dropped to her knees at the sight of her son’s body. I don’t feel right sharing my own Grief in the face of hers. I cried rivers in my co-worker’s arms when I heard.
And when I sat facing my Human Resources Director as she told me I had to go. That I had to leave a job I sometimes hated, but loved and thrived in, because of hearsay, a misunderstanding, and an acknowledged mistake. I cried then, too.
And now, as I remember that Breonna Taylor was murdered in her own bed in her own home, I cry. I lament that she was not safe — even in the place “where love resides, memories are created, friends always belong, and laughter never ends”. In her “shelter from storms ” bullets rained — more than twenty. Pierce Brown said “Home isn’t where you’re from, it’s where you find light when all grows dark,” but Breonna’s light was stolen in the dark. Her death reminds us that we are never safe here.
The global-pandemic-times-like-these-now-more-than-ever reminds us that life as we knew it will never be the same. Are we in the during or the after? The uncertainty is almost debilitating. We’re grieving.
Grief is “a natural response to loss. It’s the emotional suffering you feel when something or someone you love is taken away”. What has been taken from all of us in this moment is the security we thought we had. We’ve lost our concept of “normal,” and we’re realizing the world we once knew is gone forever.
From Jamie Cannon MS, LPC: “Grief robs us of the innocent warmth that comes with knowing where we are headed. It leaves us exposed, vulnerable, and desolate. Grief forces us to reshape our reality.”
“Grief, in its most excruciating form, is love that no longer has a place to belong.”
Here are some resources to help you on your journey:
Podcasts
Culture First by Culture Amp
Episode: “Special: How to talk about grief and suffering at work.”
- Discusses grief — big G and little g — and different empathy styles
- Learn how to hold space for others in grief and sadness (Hint: wait three seconds before responding)
Episode: “Shipwrecked by Endless Thread”
- Includes a powerful reading on Grief from Reddit
- Hear about the “before” and “after” of Grief
Note: May not be suitable for younger listeners
Articles
If you have any resources that may help others, please share in the comments.
